August 18th, 2010

The Interview

I have been looking for a job for quite some times now, the economy really sucks and I've now been unemployed for two years (without unemployment benefits mind you).  Anyways I got a call back from a company I recently applied to, they wanted an interview!  I was so excited I had problems sleeping, the interview was set for August 17th at 6pm, and my nerves were running amuck.  This was to be my first job interview since my transition, and because of that I was a wreck.. would they know? would I sound ok? (I havent had voice surgery yet).  All these things were racing through my mind knowing that this was my first opportunity in two years I must make the best of it.  Anyways so the day of the interview came by, I got ready many hours early just so I wasnt late, make-up was stunning, outfit was great, nerves..... still shot.

So I get to my interview, early, everything seems fine even though I feel as if I'm just a walking joke.  I calmed my nerves as best as I could and during the interview I answered every question the interviewer had very quickly and I think perfectly.  I was spot on, at least I felt so, and I wasnt the slightest bit nervous once the actual interview started.  After it was all over I started to feel dreadul, thinking to myself.. convincing myself that I was the butt end of a joke and they werent seriously interviewing me.  I guess I have my mom to thank for my low self esteem "less is more" she says when she's trying to convince me into wearing a grubby t-shirt and jeans without make up.. ie: boy myself down.  She really hates my transition but claims she's supportive.  Just glad I didnt take her advice and waltz into my interview looking like a hobo off the corner just walked in...

Anyways, the day after the interview I feel better, knowing I did my best and if I dont get the job it was a first experience, I mean quite literally it was my first interview ever since the transition.  With luck they'll call me back next week but I'm not holding my breath.  Until then I'll keep looking, someday, someone will hire me reguardless of who or what I am.

Love, Sara